A GLUT OF STORIES

As you may know, I am a writer, and for many years I tried to make a living writing novels. Came close, but no cigar. Oh, well.

My theory was that if you wrote well enough, and put out engaging and meaningful stories, you might have a chance.

But now I see a society overwhelmed with stories, a popular culture that has a glut of narrative.

Today, the LA Times has a section called "The Envelope" which is full of stories and ads about TV dramas. Lordy, there are a million of them, or so it seems. I counted ads for 24 dramatic TV series. And that doesn't count the 300-400 movies that come out every year, plus thousands of novels and nonfiction books. Some 180,000 books are published in the USA annually, according to some estimates.

How does a writer compete in this environment? It's like prescribing drugs to a society that is already over-medicated.

Here, folks, is yet another story. Why should anyone care? Because mine has more depth and better writing? Do people honestly give a big hairy rat's derriere?

I wonder. I used to believe that if you wrote well enough, you could float the pages out the window, and they would find an audience.

Ha! It is a lot more complicated than that. It involves agents and editors and corporate conglomerates. Most of what is published, at least in fiction, seems less than stellar. How do you compete against bestselling literary junk food?

I don't know, but I will keep at it--because this is what I seem wired to do, and this is what I want to do--and we shall see what happens.

My philosophy has always been simple: Go after what you want in life. If you don't, you know you aren't going to get it. If you do, at least you have a fighting chance.

Wish me luck. I will surely need it. Big time.

Meanwhile, I have to say I do love it. Win or lose.

- Roger

Copyright © 2012, Roger R. Angle

JOURNALISTIC CRAP

I was appalled the other day to read this opening line of an article in the June 3, 2012, issue of Los Angeles Times Magazine:

"The world is obsessed with Blake Lively."

Really? Who the hell is Blake Lively? I never heard of it or him or her.

The article's headline is "Blake Lively." Then the teaser lines say she is "at the center of Oliver Stone's crime thriller Savages." I never heard of it either.

I hate this kind of journalistic crap.

How are we supposed to believe anything in this article? Why would anyone read further? I didn't, and I won't.

I tried to find an e-mail address for the bylined writer, Leslie Gornstein, but couldn't find one. I was going to gently and politely point out that she is a purveyor of journalistic bullsh**. Of course, it could be that her editor added that stupid line. Such things happen.

You can see why some people have lost respect for newspapers and magazines.

I have to point out that the news pages of the LA Times are enormously more respectable than those of this cheesy magazine. And there are still great newspapers and magazines out there. I rely on The New Yorker and The New York Times. The latter's weekly magazine is good, I think.

The problem is that a lot of people have no quick and easy guide to what is junk journalism and what is reliable.

-- Roger

Copyright © 2012, Roger R. Angle

CRAP RULES

Good article about mediocrity, which is everywhere in the good old USA:

http://www.latimes.com/entertainment/news/tv/la-ca-puttnams-law-20120603,0,672709.story#tugs_story_display

People are afraid to be too creative, too original, too inventive, at least in culture and the arts. It's OK to be bad, if you are bad like everyone else.

The same thing is true in popular and not-so-popular literature. Most fiction in the USA today is unbearable crap. But few venture outside the norms.

This is true of all kinds of fiction, from so-called literary fiction, which is not usually very literary at all, to the most blatant of genres, mystery fiction.

The famous mystery writer Raymond Chandler said, toward the end of his career, “As I look back on my own stories it would be absurd if I did not wish they had been better. But if they had been much better they would not have been published.”

Maybe this also accounts for the preponderance of crap in the art world.

-- Roger

Copyright © 2012, Roger R. Angle

WORST BOSS EVER

I was thinking today about the worst boss I ever had. He was controlling, no trust, no confidence in anyone but himself. No respect for anyone. He was the opposite of a good manager.

The famous manager and management guru Jack Welch famously said that being a manager is like being a gardener. Your job is to water the flowers and get rid of the weeds.

My old boss, Brian, was just the opposite. He treated everyone like weeds. He treated everyone like dirt. He didn't trust anyone. Everyone who worked there was physically sick. All 15 people separately and individually woke up at 4:00 in the morning with diarrhea. When it started to happen to me, I quit. Told him to go make whoopee with himself, only not in those words.

A terrible gardener. A black thumb. I hope he is broke and poor and miserable somewhere. Maybe even in jail. Couldn't happen to a nicer guy.  

I don't know if other people wish their bad bosses would burn in hell. I sure do.

-- Roger

Copyright © 2012, Roger R. Angle

NO TO GRANOLA BARS - YES TO BEER

Blew it today. Caught out running errands and got way, way, way too hungry, all of a sudden, like I do.

So I ate a two Nature Valley granola bars. Big mistake. They only hold me about 20 minutes. Too high in carbohydrates and low in protein. And those little bucker-muckers loaded me up with 380 calories!

So then, cuz I had to have more protein, I drank a Bolthouse Farms protein shake. Wow, that was great, tasty and filling, and I am still full, two and a half hours later. Yes! That's what I'm talkin' about.

So it makes a big diff what you slug down yo mouth, children.

So far, I've gobbled up 1840 calories, and it's only 5:30 p.m. (or 1730 hrs), but that total would be 1460 calories without those stupid granola bars.

Let that be a lesson to you, Lard Belly. Yessir. (I salute.)

Now there is almost no way to lose weight today. I will need to chomp something around 7:00 p.m. Oh, well.

The struggle goes on. Maybe I'll have a beer. Hump it.

-- Roger

Copyright © 2012, Roger R. Angle

THE SKINNY ON THE SKINNY

Some foods make me hungry.

Carbs, for example. If I eat a whole-wheat flour tortilla, with hummus and hot sauce--I scarfed up two last night--in about half an hour I get hungry for another one. Carbs beget carbs. If I wait a little bit longer, I go starving crazy out of my mind.

Hell, that's 250 calories. I want it to last two and a half hours. But it doesn't. Why is that? Who the hell knows? Has something to do with food chemistry, I think.

Same thing is true of sweets. If I start eating chocolate covered almonds, pretty soon I am in there on my hands and knees, like a beggar or a supplicant, grubbing away, like a man in love. It's embarrassing.

But this morning at 6:00 a.m. (0600) I ate one tomato, about 35 calories, and I did not get hungry for an hour and a half. That is a good ratio of time to calories consumed. At that rate, I can win this battle of the bulge.

When I got hungry, about 7:30 a.m. (0730, if you prefer), I decided to splurge on calories and eat a banana with peanut butter. Yum. But oh is that fat city, in both ways: 300 calories.

(I estimate calories, using a book or counter. Here is one:
http://caloriecount.about.com/calories-bananas-i9040
There are lots of these on the Web.)

It is now 8:45 or 0845, and I've gobbled up 350 calories or so. That is probably a little higher than I want, so I'll see if I can slow down the calorie intake. Am drinking green tea with no sugar, and it tastes great, thank the Lard (sic). So that is workin' for me.

Let's see how the day goes. Worked out yesterday, 40 minutes, level "B." Pretty vigorous, but not exhaustive. Will try to move around a lot today, keep the flab moving. Flab in motion tends to stay in motion. Ha!

Am thinking about buying a get-skinny book. Never done that before. I'll let you know. "The Mayo Clinic Diet" looks good online. Hmmm. Maybe. (Mayo does not stand for Mayonnaise, BTW.)

When I started this, on March 28, I weighed 174 at my doctors office. Lost five tons ... ooops, sorry, five pounds ... in ten days, but now am holding at 170. Not so good. My goal: 155.

More later, as the saga of the sag continues. Wish me luck.

-- Fat Roger, a.k.a. Lard Belly

Copyright © 2012, Roger R. Angle

HOW TO LOSE WEIGHT: THE FAT AND THIN OF IT

The most popular books in the USA are two kinds: cook books and weight-loss books.

Ironic, huh? We fatten up and then try to slim down.

Turns out that losing weight is the simplest thing in the world. Calories. That is all it is.

My baseline is 2,000 calories a day. If I consume less, I lose weight. If I consume more, I get fat.

Simple. Here is a good way to figure yours:
http://walking.about.com/cs/calories/l/blcalcalc.htm

I can break it down by the hour. If I eat 100 calories an hour, for 16 waking hours, I lose weight. If I eat 200 calories an hour, for ten hours, I maintain my current weight. If I consume 3,000 calories a day, as I used to, I go chow-chow, baby, chub-chub, and become a bigger lard-belly.

For me, the best thing is to aim for about 150 calories an hour, for 12 hours. I tend not to get so hungry at night.

I need to keep something in my belly, otherwise I get too hungry and overeat. Some foods are higher in fiber, protein and healthy fat than others. Those work the best: Try Kashi Go Lean cereal with non-fat milk. Low-fat cheese. Whole wheat bread and tortillas. Tacos not burritos. Salads of course, with non-fat dressing. Fruits and veggies. Lean meat: chicken, fish, low-fat beef.

Foods to avoid: Ice cream is the worst. It never fills you up and it makes you want more and more. Caloric? Don't ask. Chips are bad. So are whole milk and cheese.

A little beer is OK. It's non-fat. No, really. It ranges from 150 to 200 calories per 12 oz. That isn't bad, if you don't eat cheeseburgers and fries along with it.

Good luck. People like Dr. Horse's Butt Phil on TV make millions by suckering people into buying their weight-loss books. Don't do it. Just count those calories. Keep it simple. And low-cal. You will lose weight. I guarantee it. It's up to you, not Dr. Phil.

Of course, if you exercise at all, you are ahead of the game.

-- Roger

Copyright © 2012, Roger R. Angle